I started down my own Lifestyle path many years ago. My first experience I recall with power exchange was with a certain babysitter I had, who seemed to quite enjoy it when I brushed her hair. I noticed that her breathing changed, her face became relaxed and her eyes closed. I felt like a puppet master, king of the world! I could “make” her act in a way that I enjoyed. For just a few seconds it was as if nothing else existed.
At the time I did not know what exactly it was that she liked but I knew that I enjoyed the feeling of being able to make her react like that. In fact, I liked it a lot. Naturally I experimented more and found not only did she enjoy my brushing but if I “accidentally” pulled her hair, she would make this most interesting face…thus the inner Dominant in me was awakened and life has never been the same.
School turned into one excuse after another to pull on little pigtails, always looking for that moment of a certain look or reaction. As a side result, it also got me in rather a bit of trouble that I shall chalk up to “learning experiences”.
It was not until years later that I was introduced to the concepts of power exchange and BDSM. Though many I knew at the time tended to focus on the physical aspect, I was always watching and learning from those that seemed to enjoy the aspects I found fascinating. I discovered that underneath what many misunderstood as “just kinky sex”, was an amazing world of self-development and more importantly the ability to remove many masks we wear in day to day life.
Interestingly enough, it was during a workshop on flamenco dancing, that I was first introduced to a term that in a very poetic manner, sums up my personal Lifestyle path.
The term is “duende”. It is best explained using the words of García Lorca from his work “Play and Theory of the Duende”:
“The duende, then, is a power, not a work. It is a struggle, not a thought…it is not a question of ability, but of true, living style, of blood, of the most ancient culture, of spontaneous creation.
The duende’s arrival always means a radical change in forms. It brings to old planes unknown feelings of freshness, with the quality of something newly created, like a miracle, and it produces an almost religious enthusiasm.
All arts are capable of duende, but where it finds greatest range, naturally, is in music, dance, spoken poetry, for these arts require a living body to interpret them, being forms that are born, die, and open their contours against an exact present.”
Through many workshops, classes, lecture and demonstrations, I began to understand and then explore this concept of duende that lay within The Lifestyle. The more I understood and appreciated it, the more I found that this was not a concept unique to The Lifestyle. It was in fact a base element of all human interaction. One that I was driven to understand.
This led me into a journey of school, training and finally the world of hypnosis and its applications in hypnotherapy. Observing and learning from some amazing hypnotists and therapists, motivated me to specialize into becoming the Lifestyle hypnotherapist I am today.
I continue to develop, study and model, much about power exchange relationships as a therapeutic modality and each day find more ways to implement this viewpoint to assist all my clients, regardless of their Lifestyle preferences.
I am known in the scene simply as “H”. If needed, submissives may address me as Sir H or whatever variation they have in place for their protocol. I demand no title, save that which I earn from those I work with.
I have worked with all manner of power exchange relationships ranging from casual to 24/7 TPE dynamics. From new submissives, experienced pony players, fembots and most everything else one can think of. I have found great satisfaction in submissive development and dedicate a good portion of my time in this area.
I do not align with any group in particular and due to workload I typically only attend public events for networking, training or to introduce new people to the Lifestyle. If you see me, feel free to say hi.